#39: The Best “Mask” to Wear is the One You Choose

confidence discernment empowerment Dec 12, 2019
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Maybe you can identify with a friend of mine, who recently said she feels “like I’m struggling to be two people.”

In essence, she’s tired of having to spend all the extra energy being Person “A” in her work life, where her colleagues only see the positivity of a “can-do” worker. But she tells me she’s wearing a mask.

On the outside of that mask is everything she wishes she could be on the inside, because in there it’s sad and lonely. Person “B” isn’t sure where she belongs. Even at home with her husband.

When we got to talking, I had to interrupt and say, “Well, what if you’re just wearing the wrong mask?” What if you could shield the world from your inner hurts and yet have authentic vibrancy without all the taxing effort? Would that even be possible?

Today’s episode of The Bipolar Now Podcast is the extended answer to those questions.

Don't miss it!


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  • Wearing a mask means you have a love-hate relationship with yourself. On the inside, you hate the things you feel and think about and do.

  • Displays of masked emotions reveal that you are attempting resilience, which is inner strength.

  • Getting your inner state to more accurately (and less painstakingly) reflect to your outer displays is accomplished by changing the function of your mask from that of a shield to that of a filter, which purifies what’s poured out.


Lifer Discussion Guide

Use the questions in today’s Lifer guide to help you look for place you’ve been masking your internal world lately. “Lifers” are special people who have the kind of faithfulness to you that assures you they’ll be there when called upon. If you haven’t nominated a Lifer as part of your non-medical support team, what are you waiting for? :-)


The Questions:

1) Describe a time when you had to conceal how you really felt in order to preserve a relationship.

2) Who is one important person in your life that you wear a mask in front of?

3) How do you interpret this idea of changing the function of your mask from shielding to filtering?

4) Will you let me know the filtered and unfiltered stories of where you struggle in life? / Can we be honest and aware of how we filter?


Join the Tribe!

Once you’ve had a chance to talk or journal about these things you might have a question from this episode. If so, make sure you head on over to The Bipolar Now Podcast Network on Facebook! There’s quite a few people over there who are also taking a new step in their mental health. And we’d love for you to share your story with us when you’re ready. So don’t miss out!


Other ways to enjoy this episode

Download a transcript